Sasha's Home Coming

On Monday, 4/19 we received a call from our agency.  They had some news for us.... it was good news!  Our case manager informed us that we have received a court date!  This was a little bit unexpected due to recent developments in Russia regarding adoptions with the United States.  While there was no confirmation of delays in our region we still had some concern that our court date could be delayed for some time.  Surprisingly our court date is the same date that was estimated on our first trip in March assuming everything went smoothly.  Apparently God is bigger than glitches because it seems that our case and all the paperwork went smoothly and timely.  What an answer to prayer that is.   

I'm sure you're wondering about the details so here's the plan as we know it today: 

05/02 - leave ICT for Russia

05/04 - court date

05/04-05/13 - 10 day waiting period.  We can only visit Sasha during this time. 

05/14 - go to baby home to pick up Sasha

05/17 - fly to Moscow

05/18-05/21 - appointments in Moscow at the U.S. Embassy, etc.

05/22 - return home with Sasha to ICT

We took this past week to really comprehend the news and let the reality of it sink it.  For most couples they never forget the day they got the phone call with their referral.  Because of the multiple referrals we worked through prior to Sasha the day we got her referral was rather uneventful.  The phone call with the doctor who evaluated Sasha was a happy time we won't ever forget but still we remained cautious.  Learning of our court date in the midst of everything going on in Russia was our big moment.  We couldn't return the call to our case manager fast enough.  We hung on every word she had to say and then were in complete disbelief, could this really be true?  That night didn't want it was hard to fall sleep; both afraid we would wake up and find it was just a dream.  We were overwhelmed yet filled with joy and excitement and wonder and  love and every other emotion one can imagine.  Needless to say,we were both rather unproductive at work the rest of the day.  For us this was THE phone call that we had been waiting 18 months to receive. 

 

God Sightings: part 6

I've previously touched on this post back when it originally happened but think it's worth repeating and expanding on.  It's an awesome testimony to God's perfect timing and a great reminder of how He allows people to go in and out of our lives at just the right time for a reason.  I don't believe in coincidences just in miracles and God's perfect plan and provision.  

As you may recall, our first trip to Russia started out with a bit of a snag.  Due to severe weather at JFK airport they grounded all flights and closed the airport for a couple hours.  That along with the fact that one of the runways at JFK is closed for maintenance created a long list of delays and cancellations.  We arrived at JFK around 2:00 Saturday afternoon and our connecting flight didn't actually leave until after Midnight on Sunday (or Monday depending on how you look at it), delayed 30 hours.  THAT is a long time to be stuck at JFK airport.  While we haven't seen it, others have suggested we watch the Tom Hanks movie, Terminal.  I'm sure we would relate to it and enjoy it after this experience.  

A short while into our delay as passengers were gathering to find out information we met another couple from the U.S.  Surprisingly, it's easy to find other Americans in a large group of passengers getting on a Russian flight.  People with blue passports tend to stick out.  We quickly learned that this couple was on their second trip to Russia for their court date.  They live in Pennsylvania so they drove up to JFK to catch the flight.  The four of us continued to hang out and visit throughout the day and into the night.  Finding things to talk about was not a problem and actually we have several things in common.  

As the clock approached 11:00 pm on Saturday the airline officials still kept telling us that our flight was going to leave that night.  Finally around 2:00 am the announcement came that they were canceling the flight.  By this time all the hotels close to the airport were full due to all the earlier flight cancellations plus it was so late that there was no shuttle service available as a means of transportation anyway.  We were so exhausted and had such a long day, this was not good news.  Our new found friends decided they were going to leave the airport and drive out to Long Island to find a hotel for the night.  Thankfully they invited us to join them.  This allowed us an opportunity to get at least a few good hours of sleep and a shower. By 4:00 am we were in a bed falling asleep instead of struggling to catch some rest on a chair at the airport.         

We were told to return to the airport by noon on Sunday and that our flight would leave early afternoon.  As with the day before, it was difficult finding anyone to answer questions or to get any kind of updates on the status of our flight.  Whenever the airline would make an announcement it was typically in Russian so we didn't understand it.  We spent another long day waiting and watching the other flights come and go on time.  Finally about 10:00 pm we were told the plane we would be flying on had just arrived.  Once it was fueled and cleaned we would begin loading.  Of course that didn't happen timely and as I mentioned it was midnight the last time I looked at my watch while we sat on the plane out on the tarmac.  But at least we were FINALLY on our way!

Meeting the Thomas family was such a blessing.  Not only did it provide us with an opportunity to get out of the airport for a time, we began a friendship that we hope will continue as we both raise our little ones from Russia.  As I write this update their little boy should be arriving home with his forever family!  Another amazing thing about meeting this couple was the calmness it created in all four of us.  We all agreed that our behavior during this whole ordeal was anything but normal.  Even amidst all the confusion and tiredness and frustration our attitudes remained calm and our spirits positive.  Thankfully we all knew that our time in Russia would not be affected by this glitch so we were able to make the best of it and use this time to get to know each other a little bit.  

Once we arrived in Moscow we parted ways but agreed to meet back at the airport the following Saturday prior to our flight home.  It was great seeing them again on Saturday and hearing about their court date and the time they had with their son.  For them this was the second of three trips because they have another son at home.  Since they didn't want to be away from him so long, Mrs. Thomas was going to return to Russia a third time after the10 days waiting period passed to bring their second son home.  Our flight home went smoothly and as we parted ways hugs and information was exchanged by all.  So, if you think about the Thomas family say a prayer for them and their growing family along with us.  You might also keep an eye out the next time you're delayed at an airport.  You never know what God might do and how He may use you and the people around you.          

God Sightings: part 5

I've heard stories of couples who go through an adoption process and then a couple years later they file for divorce. I found myself thinking that if they were in a bad marriage and heading towards divorce why would you want to adopt a child. Well, I think after going through the process of an adoption I can better understand what brought them to that decision. These couples probably had no idea where their marriage was headed when they began the adoption process. As I've mentioned previously, the process of an international adoption changes you. In my opinion, there's no way you can go through it and not be changed whether for the good or for the worst. It can either create a great bond between spouses or it can create a great division. 

Thankfully as we approach the end of chapter one in our adoption journey (bringing her home) Matt and I can say that our marriage is better and stronger because of it. Looking back over the past 18 months we can see how God not only used this experience to draw us closer to Him but also closer to each other. Neither one of us are big touchy, feely kind of people and neither one of us get to emotional about things. We are both strong, independent people who tend to go about our lives in a very safe, routine, predictable and comfortable fashion just sharing life together. We've never really experienced any significant mountain top highs or valley lows in our life together. Adoption has changed that. 

By the end of January of 2010 it became apparent to us both (God was stirring our hearts yet again) that this part of the process was more about us and our relationship than it was about a child. We believed from the moment we made the decision to adopt that God knew our child. And if that's true then He also knows the perfect time to unite us with our child. The question that remained was why are we still waiting more than a year later. That question was answered by searching the scriptures (James 1 and II Corinthians 4:17 to be exact) and at that point we knew this journey was far from over. We still had a lot of growing to do and it probably wasn't going to be easy.   

From that point on we found ourselves at a place of complete brokenness. Broken spirits, broken hearts, broken dreams, broken ___, you can fill in the blank and it probably would apply. During this time of brokenness we were forced to look to each other for strength and support. We were forced to be vulnerable and to talk about feelings and details that are not easy to share. Prior to this experience I can't think of a time in our relationship where we cried together.  Now we've shared tears of sadness, despair, doubt, frustration and now many tears of joy together. After 11 years together, we've learned something new about each other. An area that was "off limits" before is now open and it's "safe" to experience these kind of moments together. 

There were moments when our faith was challenged and it became a struggle to trust God and His promises. The great thing about that was every time there was a challenge God would answer with a scripture verse or words from others that provided the encouragement to keep trusting in Him.  Praise God that we can speak of this trial as something that made our marriage stronger.

God Sightings: part 4

Having made the decision to adopt internationally the next step was to chose a country.  We spent time evaluating which country was the best fit for us and we truly believed that country was Russia.  At first we worried about not picking the right country but a family member provided perspective on that.  He reminded us that the journey of adoption is a long process and if that isn't where our child is, God will open and close doors to guide us in the right direction.  With a peace about selecting Russia we moved forward.

International adoptions have become more difficult and more costly over the past several years.  Both of these criteria are true to Russian adoptions and we were aware of that from the beginning.  The difficulty and large amount of paperwork didn't intimidate us much since we both deal with that in our careers.  Initially we had trust that God would provide so we didn't concern ourselves much with the cost.  However, when we had to write that first check the cost quickly became a reality and we started to have doubts.  

At the first of every month we enter all the bills for the month into the computer and evaluate our budget for the rest of the month's expenses.  As we arrived at the month when our first check to our adoption agency was to be paid I sat down at the computer and went through the monthly routine.  After all the bills were entered for the month I couldn't believe my eyes when I saw our account balance.  It was the exact amount that we had to pay for our agency,  I quickly had Matt come and look but he being very technical and precise began to give me a hard time.  I was forgetting about the $20 we needed to include for the cost of a required book so therefore it wasn't the right amount and I was over thinking it.  Well, a few days later I think God got a good laugh.

We budget an amount for eating out and that expense is paid with cash that we withdraw weekly.  Once the cash is gone for the week, we don't eat out.  This particular week Matt had gotten our eating out money as always and then we went to Outback for dinner.  We paid with the designated cash.  A couple days later on the way to the gym Matt realized he still had our eating out money in an envelope in his coat pocket.  He took it out and expected to see $20 left since we had already eaten out once that week. To his surprise there was $40 in there.  A short while later as he sat in the sauna at the gym, the revelation hit him.  THAT was the difference!  That covers the $20 he had been giving me a hard time about earlier in the week.  That plus the balance in the computer did equal the exact amount of the first check we had to write.  He immediately new this was God's reassuring hand, letting us know that He will provide and we need to trust in Him.  

While we had money in savings to cover that first check, to see the exact amount at that specific time was a real blessing and a sense of confirmation.  There's a saying that if God leads you to it, He will lead you through it.  Over and over again we have seen this to be true.  We continue to be amazed at the many ways God has provided over the past 18 months since we made a decision to pursue adoption.  Financially we  have been truly and unexpectedly blessed.  God not only met our needs but far exceed them.