A home for the holidays

Christmas was difficult this year knowing our little one was spending the holidays away from home and his/her family.  We enjoyed celebrating the birth of Jesus with family and friends yet we did that with a heaviness in our hearts.  This was really the first time we experienced the emptiness and heartache that goes along with the uncertainty that adoption brings.  At this point in the the process we know he/she is born and probably between the age of 1 and 2.  Definitely old enough to be experiencing Christmas but probably not the type of Christmas we would want for our child.  Knowing he/she is out there somewhere brought many tears as we celebrated the holiday season this year.  As the year comes to a closee we are left with the  hope that next year our little one will have a home for the holidays.   

Smooth Sailing!

Well, we are counting down the days!  No, not days until we leave for Russia but days until we leave for our CRUISE!!!!  Back in October we were really beginning to feel the strain and frustration of this long adoption process.  Adoption has consumed our life, our decisions and most conversations for almost a year now and yet we are no where near the end of the journey.  It's been a real struggle to find the balance of living life and moving forward when you are waiting helplessly on a child.  We decided that we needed to make some plans.  We needed something else to focus our attention on and to look forward to.  We began contemplating a year end vacation.  It's a good time for us both to be off of work and it's also kind of nice having that time of rejuvenation going into to tax season.  We have always wanted to do a cruise and decided now was as good a time as any to embark on that adventure! So, that's how we will start 2010 off and we are excited for all the changes yet to come as we look ahead!

Wishing everyone a new year filled with many blessings and God sightings.  Don't forget to look at the interuptions in life, too.  I find that's where I see God's blessings the most since those aren't according to my own plans.  

Hopeful Moments of Thanksgiving

This year we were given a little gift of encouragement as the season of Thanksgiving approached.  It was Monday the 23rd of November when the e-mail came across our computers.  It was an e-mail from CWA and we needed to contact our case manager as soon as possible.  Apparently they had some news for us!  Whiile it wasn't an actual referral there was a child for us to consider.  The DOE contacted our faciliator with some informaiton about a 4.5 year old boy.  They knew this was beyond the age range we had requested/been approved for in our paperwork but wanted to know if we would be willing to consider this child anyway.    If it was a possible match then they would issue the referral.  However, due to many factors we were not able to consider this boy at the present time.  We trust that if this is our child, God will work out the details and provide confirmation when the time is right.  While it's difficult to let this child pass by, we were also greatly encouraged.  As a result of this request we found out that we are next in line for a referral.  What that means exactly, we don't know.   That could still be weeks or even months away but at least we know the DOE is working on our information and we aren't lost somewhere in the paperwork shuffle.

After months of hearing nothing, it was encouraging to get this little bit of news.  God is working and guiding us through each step in this process.  He continues to provide us with encouragement just when we need it most.  We are so Thankful we have a God who watches over His children and loves us and protects us and blesses us beyond what we deserve.

The Decision

2008 was quite the year for us.  In March we became part of a new church plant, Beacon Community Church,  that is located in one of the Wichita suburbs.  This required us to act in obedience and leave the church where Jenny's family and many close friends attended.  Little did we know then just how much God would use this decision to change our lives.  The pastor and his wife who came to lead the church have a little girl who they adopted.  They have been very open with us regarding their little girl and the adoption process.  In addition, God blessed us with new friendships in the Beacon church family.  One of those families added to their family with the birth of twin girls in the late spring.  We spent a lot of time with this family and grew to love their children.  Over the next several months I came to the realization that it wasn't a matter of IF we would one day adopt but WHEN we would adopt.  Matt and I never talked about this so imagine my surprise when on Thanksgiving day Matt approached me and said we needed to talk about something that had been on his mind....adoption.  Unbeknownst to each other, God had been changing our hearts individually.  Amazing!  Neither one of us tried to influence the other and neither one of us shared what had been happening in our own heart.  Then on this one day we came together united and began a journey that would forever change our lives.